Feb 5, 2010

Posted by in Parenting | 0 Comments

Don’t Fight in front of the Children!

It is rare for people to live together under one roof without any arguments, but reconciliation is better and correcting oneself is a virtue.

What shakes the unity of the family and harms its infrastructure is when conflicts are brought out into the open before the members of the family, who then split into two or more opposing camps, not to mention the psychological harm that is done to children, especially little ones.

Think about a home where the father says to the child, “Do not speak to your mother,” and the mother says to him, “Do not speak to your father.”

The child is confused and filled with turmoil, and the entire family lives in an atmosphere of hostility. We should try to avoid conflict, but if it happens, we should try to hide it.

Things to consider

  • Stop and think about what you’re teaching your children – most likely aggression, stubbornness and selfishness.
  • In the heat of the moment, Shaytan may try and justify what you are doing. You should seek refuge in Allah from Shaytan and stop justifying it!
  • You have a choice: either follow your temporary desires or love your children. When you fight in front of your children, you are putting your selfish needs in front of your children.
  • Fighting will occur sometimes in every marriage, however you should do it away from the children. If your children think marriage is all about arguing and fighting, this may lead them to put off getting married when they get older. This may in turn cause them to form illegitimate relationships.
  • The children don’t care who’s right, they just want to see their parents happy
  • You may be able to turn conflicts into something beneficial. If your children see you discussing issues with your partner in a controlled and open manner, insha Allah they will grow up to be reasonable and considerate people.

We ask Allaah to create love between our hearts.

Source: http://islam4parents.com/

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